


Observational Skills

by stardustandswimmingpools



Category: Brooklyn Nine-Nine (TV)
Genre: Bisexual Female Character, Bisexual Female Character of Color, Bisexual Male Character, Bisexuality, CANON BI CHARACTER, Canon Bisexual Character, Canon Compliant, Coming Out, Dialogue Heavy, FUCK IT FEELS GOOD TO TYPE THAT, Gen, Humor, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, Male-Female Friendship, Rosa's Girlfriend who is unnamed as of yet, The Academy, ahhhhhh, bi jake, bi rosa, canonverse, car talks, i am much better at writing enclosed fics like this, one OC because jake had to have a boyfriend, spoilers for 5x09 (99), vague descriptions of what detectives do
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-06
Updated: 2017-12-06
Packaged: 2019-02-11 06:19:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,737
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12929334
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/stardustandswimmingpools/pseuds/stardustandswimmingpools
Summary: Either Rosa is very obvious or Jake is very observant, and though neither of these things seem particularly likely, anything's possible, really.orJake and Rosa work it out while sitting in a car.





	Observational Skills

**Author's Note:**

> this fic is 500000% dedicated to the writers of brooklyn 99 for making my girl Rosa canonically bi!!!! YOUR FAVE WOULD NEVER!!! i love you fox  
> i literally wrote this just now so please forgive any mistakes and above all please fucking enjoy the fact that rosa is officially canonically bisexual. now all we need is a canon bi!jake and i'll be satisfied. onwards!

It’s Tuesday and Jake and Rosa are on a stakeout at Jake’s old high school. He hasn’t stopped telling stories about it.

“And this one time, Ms. Nishi left the classroom for two minutes and this kid in our class pulled the fire alarm,” he says, and then snorts derisively. “I mean, what an idiot, right?”

“The kid was you, wasn’t it,” Rosa says.

“Yeah, but it was an accident! Joey Keller pushed me out of my seat and I grabbed the closest thing!”

Rosa rolls her eyes. “Sounds like your high school years were crazy memorable.”

Jake tilts his head, probably reminiscing more. “Huh. Maybe. Not really. I just remember flashes, like you know how in movies they have that one moment where their life flashes before their eyes, except it’s not their whole life, it’s just, like, the ten most important moments? That’s how I feel about high school.”

“Well, either way, you’re gonna get your comeuppance now,” Rosa says, jutting her chin out at the looming academic building in front of them. It’s temporarily shut down for construction (Jake claims that one of the science labs caught fire, which Rosa personally thinks is totally dope), but it’s where they’ve been tipped off about their perp, so here they are. “Ten bucks says we break a window.”

Jake squints. “Deal,” he says decisively. “Although I'm warning you I might not have ten bucks to spare. So you better really hope you lose this bet, pal!”

Rosa grins dryly despite herself. Jake has always been one of her closer friends (and that’s quite an accomplishment in itself — Rosa has few people she’d genuinely consider friends), and she sometimes feels like they’re drifting apart. Jake and Amy are engaged, now, which is, well, totally whack. And Rosa…

As if summoned by Rosa’s wayward thinking, her phone suddenly buzzes on the dash with a call. Jake peers over at the screen as Rosa snatches it up. “Who is it? Who’s calling?”

“None of your business,” Rosa mutters, and hits the  _ answer _ button. “Hey, what’s up?”

Jake is watching her curiously, and Rosa can tell he’s straining his ears to hear the other end of the conversation. 

“Hey, babe,” her girlfriend says. “Is now a bad time?”

_ Never a bad time for you, _ Rosa wants to say — or at least that’s what she thinks. But that’s a disgustingly cheesy thing to say. And also, it is actually a bad time.

“Depends,” she says begrudgingly. “Is everything okay?”

“Yeah, no, I’m great! Just checking up on you.”

Rosa smiles, then catches herself. Jake whispers, “Who is that? Is it a girl? Is it someone I know?”

“Shut it, Jake,” Rosa hisses, covering the mouthpiece. She uncovers it and says, “All’s good. I’m on a stakeout with Jake.”

“Ooh, that’s the guy from the academy, right?”

“Yeah, that one. And he’s being nosy,” she adds, glaring pointedly at him. Jake unabashedly does not move away.

“Okay, well, I’ll leave you two to your work. Call me when you’re done?”

“Yeah,” Rosa says, “of course.” She clears her throat. God, when did she become such a sap? “‘Bye.”

When she hits the red button to hang up, Jake is staring expectantly at her with those big puppy dog eyes.

“Hey, no way,” Rosa snaps. “Don’t use that look on me.”

“Please?” Jake begs. “Just tell me who you were talking to! Just tell me the first letter of their name.”

“No, I’m not —” Rosa pauses. In her mind she sifts through the possible outcomes of telling Jake the truth. It strikes her that there aren’t a lot of people she would trust with that — the truth — but he’s definitely one of them.

They’ve had each others’ backs for years. Something like this shouldn’t change that. It wouldn’t. 

_ Guess it’s a day for being reckless, _ she concedes mentally. Aloud, she mumbles, “That was my girlfriend on the phone. Happy?”

“You have a  _ girlfriend?  _ ” Jake echoes, appalled. There’s a moment, a silence that hangs in the air until Rosa would actually admit that she’s  _ nervous _ , and then he continues, “And you didn’t bother telling  _ me _ ?”

Rosa blinks. That’s the last thing she’d expected. Leave it to Jake to say the wrong thing, and yet somehow say exactly the right thing. “Seriously? That’s what you’re hung up on?” Gruffly, she adds, “Aren’t you gonna ask if I’m a lesbian?”

Jake looks thoroughly confused. “Uh...If you want? Rosa, are you a lesbian?”

“No,” Rosa grinds out, “I’m bi. Don’t make a big deal about it, alright?”

Jake snorts and then laughs, and Rosa stares at him. He keeps laughing, though, for a solid minute, before exhaling and saying, “Oh, my god, Rosa, for a detective as smart as you are, I’d have thought you’d be more observant than  _ this _ .”

“What the hell are you talking about?” Rosa says defensively, feeling like she’s missing out on an inside joke between Jake and himself. It’s a feeling she has oddly frequently. 

Jake manages to calm himself down enough to take a deep breath. “Rosa Diaz,” he says, as if preparing to tell her something like  _ I killed a man _ or  _ I’m pregnant _ , “I am also bi.”

Rosa does a double-take, flinching backwards instinctively. There he goes again, saying the last thing she’d ever expect to hear. “What?”

Jake laughs again. It’s like this whole thing is a big joke to him. Rosa has to periodically remind herself that most things are just a big joke to Jake. Whenever anyone brings up the subject of a dentist, he laughs genially and says he hasn’t had a dentist for ten years.

“ _ Rosa _ ,” he says emphatically, “I had a boyfriend  _ at the academy. _ ”

Rosa blinks. “What?”

“I know, right? I’m as surprised as you are. I guess I’m just as charming and gorgeous as everyone is always saying I am,” Jake says flippantly. Rosa smacks his arm. 

“Not that, dumbass, the part where you had a boyfriend. Who was it? Why didn’t I know?”

Jake rubs his shoulder tenderly. “Ouch, Rosa! Do you ever stop to think that your actions may have consequences? Like my probably-bruised shoulder?”

Rosa smacks him again. “Spill, dude.”

“Okay, okay! His name was Jimmy, he was, like, six feet tall, probably a swimmer or something in another life, kinda stubbly but in a rugged, handsome way, not in a gross I-live-in-my-mother’s-basement way.” Jake wrinkles his nose. “He also always smelled like oranges. Did you know oranges have a very distinct smell? I haven’t eaten an orange since we broke up when I found out he actually  _ did _ live in his mother’s basement and also that he was pretty anti-semitic. But, you know, we had some fun times.”

“No way,” Rosa says, unable to hide the disbelief in her voice. “ _ You _ dated Jimmy the Joke?”

“The what?”

“We called him Jimmy the Joke because he was so freaking bad at everything,” Rosa says, and despite herself, she cracks a grin. “Holy shit, I can’t believe you were banging the least capable policeman to ever step foot in that place.”

She racks her brain, trying to find further evidence that Jake’s been bisexual this whole time. Now that she knows, it couldn’t be more obvious. Before he was with Amy, Jake made comments about  _ every _ attractive stranger that passed. Not just the women.  _ Everyone. _ Rosa reminds herself that she tends to tune Jake out most of the time, which is probably the reason she didn’t notice. That, and also, a possible preoccupation with her own bisexuality. 

“Hey, at least I’m open about it!” Jake says, raising an accusing eyebrow. “Besides, I always knew you were bi. I just figured you’d tell me when you wanted to. No biggie.”

Rosa does her second double-take. She’s learning a lot about Jake’s observational skills, and her own lack thereof, on this stakeout. “How did you know?” she demands.

“What, like you’re subtle?” Jake scoffs. “I saw you checking out the girls at the academy. I also saw you checking out Gina that one time. Don’t think I didn’t see. I didn’t say anything because I’m your favorite person in the world and also I’m still a little scared of you, but mostly the first thing.”

Rosa fake-vomits. “Gross, Peralta! Gina? Like  _ Gina _ Gina?”

“I’m just telling you what I saw,” Jake fires back. “And what I saw was incriminating evidence of your blatant bisexuality. Except bisexuality isn’t a crime, so it wasn’t incriminating, but the point still stands!”

Rosa leans back in the driver’s seat, her cell phone still in the palm of her hand. Jake leans back too, huffing out a breath. 

“Well,” Rosa says brusquely, “thanks for letting me say it on my own time. I guess.”

Jake grins widely. “Aww, Diaz. You’re getting all soft on me! Is this because you have a girlfriend now? Are you going to become increasingly similar to the majority of the female population that doesn’t feel the need to be intimidating all the time?”

“I would never,” Rosa says, hiding a grin of her own. “It’s like you don’t know me at all.”

“Ah ah ah, on the contrary,  _ ma chèrie, _ ” Jake says, waggling a finger over his atrocious French accent. “I know you better than you know yourself. How cool is that?”

Rosa rolls her eyes. “Have you been watching for our perp?”

Jake stills. “Um.”

“I’m changing my bet,” she adds. “Ten bucks  _ you  _ break a window.”

Jake sucks in an offended breath. “Rosa Diaz, how dare you! You think I’d deface my own school property?”

“First of all, yes I do, and second of all, I didn’t say you’d break it on purpose,” Rosa says elusively.

They bicker until the perp shows up, then quietly slip out of the stakeout car and catch him, red-handed, inside an old history classroom. The guy kicks Jake in the chest and he stumbles backwards hard, crashing into a window and shattering it.

“Damn it!” he whines as Rosa handcuffs the perp and reads him his rights. “It’s like you’re psychic!”

Psychic, maybe. Being psychic would be pretty wicked. And anyway, that would probably even the scales, since apparently Jake can read her like an open book.

It makes her vaguely uncomfortable to know that he knows her so well, but also comfortable in a different way. In a safe way.

It’s good to have a friend like Jake once in awhile. 

 

**Author's Note:**

> thank you for reading! although the real thanks goes to the b99 writers, i reiterate, i love them to death. you can hit me up on tumblr @vivilevone if you're so inclined! make sure you leave a comment if you liked it! thanks!


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